Relationships, especially our intimate relationships or loving relationships are by far the most important relationship in our lives and unfortunately many of us struggle in finding the relationship and the intimacy that really works in a positive way in our lives
One of the major problem I see with intimate relationships is that many times we select the wrong partner. We select our relationships out of convenience, lust or from a place of insecurity. Instead of understanding what we desire in an intimate relationship we run into someone, we are attracted to them get involved and bingo 10-years later we realize what we realize only after a few month dating that this person is really not the right person for me. We find out later when we are ready to be honest with ourselves that we have nothing in common or that the love was never really there.
I believe that we select the wrong partner in intimate relationship from the start. So do you really know what you want from this person that you may want to spend the rest of your life with. Do you know the qualities that are a must and the ones you can live with? Do you share the same dreams, and aspirations? Will one of you continue to grow while the other is caught up in a career or sitting on the couch and getting fat or being depressed the rest of their lives?
So when it comes to relationship, first you need to select the right person who has the qualities and the characteristics that you want to be around for the rest of your life. And if you are marrying with the hope that they will change well we all know that doesn’t work in a committed relationship.
The other thing that most people miss is that a committed relationship is a partnership and like any partnership, such s a business, the committed relationship must have goals, directions and a know whether they are hitting their relationship goals and what to do about it if they are not. If this anyone in this partnership thinks ‘I’ve found my treasure and now I can sit on my rump the rest of my life and enjoy it” well you will definitely fail in this partnership. People always need to grow, to learn and to expand. If they don’t they get board, life becomes monotonous and all that’s left to do is to find fault in the other partner and destroy the relationship from within.
So you must choose to grow together. You must work together to become more, both individually and together. To keep and grow the passion that you had when you met you need to keep growing, hopefully together and in the same ways. Taking classes together to improve you communication, improve your sex life, your health and your intimacy are just a few ways one can make their relationship grow and expand. Remember your life just begins when you decide to start life together and you must look at it not as a convenience but as a partnership, a union of two people who want to make something, the most important thing in their lives work and it will take work.
For those already involved in an intamate relationship it's up to you to find these ways to put the excitement and the passion back into your lives and you must make the effort and commitment to take a stand in your commitment to grow the relationship
On this site you will find resources books and courses that will help you accomplish this together and grow your intimacy,your love and the relationship to make it something that will last a life time of happiness love and joy.
Douglas Alp |
